Monday, February 06, 2012

Pacifier, pacifier! Where art thou, pacifier?

It's amazing how much Jewel talks now, and it's fun to see her try out new words as she learns them. I will admit, however, that it's a bit more fun when it happens a bit later than 6 a.m. on a weekend day.

On Saturday, we had to get up early to get to 3B's swim lesson, but not quite as early as Jewel rose from her bed. She started off slowly, if not quietly, singing "Down to the Valley to Pray," but as soon as she saw Mama rousting to pluck her out of her crib, Jewel started with the soliloquy.

"I dropped two of my pacies. They fell on the floor. I couldn't reach them. They are down there. Where are they? I can't see them."

And so forth, all the way out the door and down the hall.

The reason Mama was peeling herself off her pillow to extract Jewel was to allow me to sleep in what little I could before swim lessons, since I'm up at 5 every weekday. As for what Jewel was doing? What does she care? Doesn't everybody take a midday nap?

The only problem with Jewel's logic is that she's starting to skip her nap some days, which is fine until about 4 p.m., when she develops a China Syndrome: total nuclear meltdown. All her beautiful words escape her, and she can't understand that she's hungry, tired and cranky, so anything we do to comfort her fails.

She often badgers us for her bottle until we eventually relent, since it's really more for the comfort than for the milk. Sometimes singing will work, although woe be to the parent who picks the wrong song, which might just be the song that worked so well yesterday at the same time. But, fortunately, she will talk enough to say which song she does want...and, of course, which specific pacie she wants if you bring her the wrong one from her quiver of 163 pacies.

All of this, of course, leads us to put her down to sleep earlier, which leads her to wake earlier, which leads us back to the start of this story.

Yes, my whole life has become an "If You Give a Cat a Cupcake" story, which is, like, totally Shakespearean, except not.

Papa Bradstein will ride 200 miles across Massachusetts in two days to help fight cancer. Please support his ride.


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