Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Gee, officer Krupke

One of the reasons that I haven't been posting regularly recently has to do with a recent diagnosis of a psychological disorder that I'm suffering from. I'm still waiting for the results of the tests that will determine how far along the continuum between neurosis and psychosis I am.

Until those results come in, here's a description of this newly defined disorder, to help you determine if you're afflicted:

Narcissistic Blog Disorder

This disorder is characterized by the creation of a blog in which the individual consistently denigrates not only the opinions of others, but the very fact that others have opinions, saying things like "nobody cares what some overpaid starlet has to say about global warming" and "nobody cares what some crusty career politician thinks is wrong with society today." Simultaneously, the individual assumes that people do care about what he or she has to say, in spite of the individual's only political or activist experience being watching the movie Dave twice.

It's coming soon to a DSM IV near you, along with Bookmark Loop Disorder, Pugilistic Discussion Syndrome, Amusement Identity Disorder. Or not.

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  1. Clearly you need to start medicating heavily. Let me know what brand you need sent over. (The absinthe bottle's almost empty.)

    --Depraved, Deprived, Deprogrammed

  2. Whenever anyone tells me that I suffer from insanity, I correct them. I tell they I enjoy every minute of it. I hope you do too.

  3. Honestly, the only neurosis I've noticed in your blog is your obsession with your fat butt. Really, with that recent bit about Barky scooting, I'd say the obsession has increased to butts in general.

  4. Until you start forcing people to read the blog against their will, I regret to inform you that people genuinely do care what you have to say.

    Although if you were actually any good as an activist you would have watched 'Bob Roberts' twice... ;-)

  5. MrJ: I've got my own Bombay Sapphire chilling in the freezer, but thanks for the offer.

    CAGirl: Yes. Yes, I do.

    Henitsirk: I believe that's the most polite way anyone's ever found to call me a butthead.

    DM: I can't believe you. I can't believe that you would so wantonly disregard my need for insecurity and self-doubt. But I am with you on Bob Roberts.

  6. Butthead? Not me. I believe that the term du jour around here would be poophead, but that's a whole other neurosis.

  7. Anonymous1:10 AM

    Ooh, I think I have the same thing. Let me know what they prescribe. ;-)