Friday, July 18, 2008

Can you smell that?

Two years ago, I had enough spare time to write about losing my sunglasses. (To your credit, my six loyal readers, few of you had the time to read about that thrilling incident.)

Two years ago, it was hotter than it is now, it was windy, and some impatient knucklehead nearly killed Mama.

Two years ago, I wasn't quite a father, but I was still a jackass.

Two years ago, when he was born, 3B had two grandmothers. Now he only has one. Grammy--Mama's mom--is wonderful, and I'm so grateful for her--not just for the favors she's done for Mama and me, but for all that she's given to 3B: love, toys, time, and so much more. However, at times like tonight, when I'm thinking about 3B's second birthday party tomorrow, wondering what we should do, how it will go, and trying to remember to do things like take pictures to share with family, I miss Mom.

I know that I'd have every intention of calling and asking her questions tonight and then I'd space out and fall asleep before I did. And I know that tomorrow, when we talked, I would ask, and she'd say, "I don't know, you'll figure it out. Before I forget, did you see that story about the sewage plant in San Francisco?" I'd tell her that Brother #2 sent me the link to the story. And then I'd ask her if any Starbucks near her were going to close, and then we'd keep talking so long that I wouldn't prepare for the party at all.

Then, I'd have to hang up because guests were arriving, and even though we would be unprepared, we'd figure everything out...which is pretty much how I operate every day around here.

I wake up most mornings totally unprepared, still unable to find my sunglasses, and still I somehow figure it out, because it's worth it--so much more worth it now than ever before, and every day more so. Mom explained this best when she wrote me a follow up email after I called her for some comfort as I suffered through leaving Mama and 3B to go back to work. We had been talking about how much we change after we have children.

Subject: It all started with Brother #1
Thinking about daddy going to work every day, reminded me of how I got into the routine of showering every morning before making breakfast for him. The routine lasted through 6 kids. I was afraid that the baby might have a problem while I was in the shower, when I could not hear him/her. While daddy was still there, he could hear and take care of any difficulties. And so new habits were created. I learned to get up when daddy got up, to get my shower before fixing breakfast. I've never been a morning person, but it was worth it.

More later. Love, Mom
Back in those days, I would sometimes get up before Mom and Dad did, and go snuggle between them in bed. These days, I soak up all the sleep I can get, so when I'm on daddy detail in the morning, I sleep as late as possible and skip showering.

What can I say? I'm still a jackass.

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  1. You stay in bed so 3B can come in and snuggle you. That is good daddy stuff. I do that every morning with my little one who is not so little anymore. At least you do not call it babysitting when it is your turn like some paternal units do.

    Oh, I did read the article, only I read it when I was in PA last month and surfing SFGate for news about northern CA fires. I liked the comment from the guy who runs the place about how nice it is, and it would not be the intended insult because it is so environmentally nice or something like that.

  2. Anonymous3:13 PM

    OK, trying to put in this dadgum comment for the third time. I had a funny wisecrack and everything.

    Happy Birthday 3B!

  3. I understand not showering. I wait for my kids to go to school, or I shower in the middle of the night. Actually now they are all old enough (2 of them adults) to take care of themselves and to clean up any blood that is spilled while I cannot hear them. I miss showers now because I am busy doing things for them to get them out the door.

    On some weekends, when dad is around, I sit in the bath and read. I am still interupted frequently though.

    Happy Birthday 3B!! Looking forward to seeing you soon.

  4. CAGirl: Dude, it's not babysitting, it's the life I want to lead, but keep getting taken away from by work.

    Amama: You'll have to share your witty wisecrack in Scrabulous.

    KMoo: Do they come in asking if you want pancakes...or boats?