Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Florida tentatively enters 20th Century

I know that it's a big planet and that it takes all kinds to make it irritating interesting on a daily basis, and I love that. For example, without all the PC aficionados in the world, who would Mac users like me have to gloat to, saying things like, "You have to restart again? Really? I think I remember restarting once this month...or was that last month?"

And if there weren't so many knuckleheads who insisted driving everywhere they go, including the 40 percent of their trips that are two miles or less, of which 90 percent are made in cars, the bike paths would be too crowded for me to ride on.

And there's the flip side: if it weren't for vegetarians like us Bradsteins, think of the crowds MetroDad would have to endure at Popeye's just to get some spicy chicken. (I can tell we're making a difference, since the Popeye's that we live up the hill from is almost always empty...I mean, I'm sure that's why it's empty all the time, right?)

However, I'm sometimes confused by my fellow travelers on this bright blue marble hurtling through the infinite vacuum of the universe. For example, I can't imagine being married for 38 years and having my wife say of me

"He didn't exist in the family," she said. "It was almost like a family of mother and children, like there was no father. Not only was he not there, I couldn't get in touch with him at all."
Or living in a society where that's the norm.

Or raising our preschooler on a chocolate diet. I'm not saying that 3B's digging into bibimbap yet--although he'll get another chance soon, since the diner near work just changed hands and added it to their menu--but he does eat a pretty good variety of foods for his age. If one of his favorite snacks is freeze dried papaya, we can't be doing everything wrong, right?

Another societal norm that I can't understand is keeping loving adults from being parents as Florida has explicity done since 1977--and which is the only state to do so now. I can't express my feelings any more clearly than the judge who ruled in this case did

''Disqualifying every gay Floridian from raising a family, enjoying grandchildren or carrying on the family name, based on nothing more than lawful sexual conduct, while assuring child abusers, terrorists, drug dealers, rapists and murderers at least individualized consideration,'' [Judge] Audlin wrote, was so ''disproportionately severe'' that it violates the state and U.S. constitutions.

Welcome to the 20th century, Florida. In the next century, we'll tell you about a little thing we call YouTube.

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  1. Anonymous10:19 AM

    About time Florida started to enter the modern era.

    Florida is such a weird state. In the North, there are areas that are so devoutly conservative that they're practically living in the plantation age. On the other hand, the South is fiercely liberal, probably owing to the large influx of people from the Northeast.

    No wonder it's always such an important swing state during presidential elections.

  2. After YouTube, who knows? Free elections?

    When 3B gets bored with bibimbap, he can come over here for some yummy Ethiopian, which was what I had up on Fairfax last night.

    And I remember restarting too, last time I got a system software update. Brand new version of iTunes, a coupla security patches, the usual goodie bag. I'd say that gives me a good excuse to clear the RAM once a month or so.

    The tunes are a requirement for us marble riders surfing the vacuum.


  3. Is the chocolate diet an improvement over the ketchup on everything diet? Or perhaps the dip it all in ranch dressing diet? My son is learning about nutrition in 5th grade science, and yesterday he said he might be done with white bread after learning how they make the flour white. I noticed that he did not take out the wheat bread yet. He does eat brown rice, because I do not give him a choice. He also eats plenty of fruit and vegetables, because that is what he can find around the house to eat.

    I restart when I download certain updates (including iTunes) but not otherwise with XP.

  4. I haven't considered FLA a part of the United States since the 2000 election. Great post!

  5. Ethiopian is fun because you get to eat with your fingers. My kids would understand that.... they eat everything with their hands (no silverware). I had ethiopian with brother M in Seattle when he was here.

  6. MD: My home state, CA, has that north-south split going too, but everyone there's too laid back to do anything about it.

    MrJ: What? You were up on Fairfax and no matzo ball soup?

    CAGirl: I've been tempted by the ketchup on everything diet, but 3B still seems to like his fruits and veggies enough for now. That effort may be sunk when he meets french fries, however.

    BnB: Oh, I think they're part of the U.S., alright, but they should be relegated, like D.C. is, to nonvoting status until they become a democracy again.

    KMoo: Right there with you--not only do you get to eat with your fingers, but you get the fun squishy bread.

  7. Anonymous10:36 PM

    I love how the salarymen are only concerned about their marriages because they might lose their money and their personal chefs and maids--I mean wives! Sweet.

    Um, my kids like junk food, when they get it, but they eat everything else too. I just don't get that "kids are picky and only eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches 24/7" thing. Sometimes I think all these parents just don't want to be in charge and simply provide good food and expect it to be eaten. (Did that sound Gestapo-ish? I just meant to be firm and resolute.)

    So the Florida attorney general thinks it's his job to "[uphold] public morality and [provide] for the healthy development of foster children by ensuring they are raised by dual-sex parents"?

    Funny, I thought it was my job to manage my own morality, or maybe my religion's. And if he thinks that being raised by same-sex parents is "unhealthy", why do they allow gay foster parents at all? And on what basis are they asserting that it is "unhealthy"? Oh, right--logic not required!