Wednesday, August 26, 2009

She may be all that, but she's not all here

We had a checkup appointment today and the results are in: we're still pregnant.

However, the baby appears to have dropped, so that's progress.

It was a good appointment, with a midwife who had a great manner. She knew her stuff, explained things clearly and understands what we're all about with our hypnobirthing. None of that should be surprising--but it's still a pleasant surprise when it all comes together. Besides, perhaps she can explain what we're all about with our hypnobirthing, since I'm still not sure how it's all going to work out.

I'm excited for hypnobirthing, however. It relaxes Mama--when I read through the exercises with her every most nights, they never fail to put her into a deep sleep almost immediately. It's great that they relax her, but of course it means that she misses most of what I say.

Hm. Perhaps that's for the best.

It also relaxes me to read through the material, which is nice, since this time around, Mama's depending on me rather than the man with the epidural needle to get her through. Hopefully, this time around I can be there for Mama rather than having to step into the next room to finalize details on our new car purchase like I did last time.

Relaxing is about all we have to do these days, since the baby girl seems perfectly content to stay in Mama's uterus for the next 10-12 years or so. I've tried explaining to her that she'll have to come out to go to kindergarten, and all she did was kick me. Or punch me. It's a little hard to tell.

So, I told her to come out of there right now so I could put her in time out because hitting is not allowed. At that point it was hard to tell if she spit at me, like her brother would have, or flipped me the bird.

Either way, my techniques aren't getting her out, so we had to talk to the midwife today about what techniques they have. The first step is to see how baby girl is doing. So we'll have tests on Friday at the hospital to see how much amniotic fluid is left and what baby girl's heart rate is. If there's any concern about either, they might send us directly upstairs for an inducement, but the odds of that are low.

You can follow me to find out how that goes.

If we don't have a baby over the weekend, we'll have another checkup on Monday, during which we'll probably ask them to strip Mama's membranes, which might prompt labor to start, if Mama and baby girl are ready for it.

If that doesn't do anything, the next appointment would be to induce, which we're hoping to schedule for next Friday evening. That's Sept. 4 for those of you keeping score at home.

And if you think that was confusing, you should have seen Mama's face when the midwife was going over it. As I said, the midwife communicated well, but to Mama, she might as well have been speaking the riddles of the Sphinx in Coptic. This is why, for everyone's safety, a woman who's nine months pregnant should always take someone with her to the doctor--someone who has not had their brain stolen by a baby to be.

But Mama still knows what's what about the most important issue: we're still pregnant.

Subscribe to the Bradstein feed--Vorsprung durch Technik!


  1. Oh I just can't wait for 3B's little sis to get here.

    I really hope the hypnobirthing works out for Mama.

  2. Me too, on both counts.

  3. By this time with my #3 (who will have the same name as your new addition) I was convinced I was no longer pregnant and would wait for all my friends to call each morning to let me know I had had the baby. They would call and if I answered the phone, they knew I was not in the hospital.

  4. According to the badge on my blog, she's three days old. Too bad she doesn't read the blog. I love that question from everyone--have you had the baby yet?

    Yes, we have, which is why I'm answering the phone and chatting with you for hours on end.

    Then again, I just called our friend who was due on Tuesday and asked her that exact question.

  5. My personal favorites were our next door neighbors who saw me in the garage, big as a barn with empty arms and asked if I had given birth yet. Some things are just not that obvious.

    I am sure Cutie will arrive when she is good and ready, and if she is like her Uncle Jumbo, she will have an excuse for being late for everything for the rest of her life.

  6. Actually, the midwife blamed the lateness on me, not your brother, MrJumbo.

    And if there's anything else about her that's like me, she'll be claiming that as an excuse for lateness throughout her life too.

    I suppose I might have learned that trick from your brother.

  7. Anonymous11:00 AM

    I delivered 2 babies naturally using a variant of hypnobirthing/active labor techniques. (First was 13 days past due date, second was 7 days past). It went great both times - no inducing & no meds whatsoever. My friend used hypnobirthing & delivered 3 babies naturally. You & your wife can do this!!! My husband was an amazing support. Good thing for your wife - second deliveries go much quicker so this will be easier than if she'd tried it first time around. Good luck!!

  8. Thanks for the encouragement. It helps to hear stories like that. They help us understand that it is possible to do this.